Ode to Claire

Boss's Boss did not reply. Being that I didn't have the cunning shoelace-tying pretext I found myself hovering outside my Boss's office with the poise and gravitas of a lemon. Boss is having a baby, which will may or may not be named Henrietta or Edward.

I have a deep aversion to dressing gowns. This is not an obstacle I have to grapple with on a daily basis as one doesn't often run across people in their dressing gowns unless one is staying at someone's house and when one is staying at someone's house it's often as one is on some sort of weekend visit and there are plans to go on country walks/have fashionable brunches/generally gorge oneself and therefore the scope for lounging around and the possible appearance of a dressing gown is kept to a minimum.

The problem is, I've got to go into hospital a week tomorrow and will have to stay for a week. A whole week. Thankfully I have had only a fleeting and perfunctory relationship with hospitals to date, but when I have had to grace them with my presence it seems that all of the patients walk around attached to drips in dressing gowns, not unlike the Walking Dead. Being that I will not be on top of the world as is, what with the hole in head and such, the wearing of dressing gown (and slippers, for that matter) could well tip me over the edge. Discussing this over carb-heavy dinner the consensus was that some sort of velour tracksuit was the only alternative. Not having felt the need to emulate Jodie Marsh (who I have met, incidentally), Jordan or J-Lo (actually I do want to emulate J-Lo) the cold light of day makes me think this is not the best or only alternative. Would really like to wear tiny little gay Aussie Bum vest and Y-fronts to shock nurses but am currently skinnyfat and not up any display of flesh. Any suggestions would be welcome.